Before our visit to the Home of Mercy (hospice) based at Saint Michael’s Monastery in Odesa, I wanted to speak about the value of life, relations of parents and children, and the culture of death after all. Above all, I wanted to do this for myself. For secondary things become more significant in everyday fuss. All the more so this Home of Mercy is by far the first one in Ukraine, it has been operating for 18 years. Currently it provides treatment for 96 patients. The establishment is a brainchild of Mother Serafyma, mother superior of the monastery. Incidentally, she is a very active mother superior, whose work is in particular aimed at cultural and social service. One can say she is one of the brands of Ukrainian Orthodox Church.
True, you come to think about life in the hospice, how you live it through. There you want to call your family, for whom you find too little time due to certain circumstances (which may even be objective); to encourage your friend who has been fighting chronic leucosis for eight years; to visit a rehabilitation center for drug and alcohol addicts where your friends work as volunteers. And already on the threshold you promise yourself that when you leave you will try to see new opportunities rather than endless problems, sow love instead of hatred, forgiveness instead of harm, hope rather than doubts, and joy instead of sadness. Or what did Saint Francis say?
Mother Khionia, the director of this Home of Mercy, to use mundane terminology, appeared before me like an angel. Mother is an elderly woman, short and slender, with a quiet voice, a look full of love, and powerful positive energy. She quotes aphorisms, often sentences from the Bible. Such people are said to walk in the world, touching heaven with their heads.
“Let’s start with a dinner,” she says and takes us to the dining room. Moving along the corridor, we go past sealed food jars with vegetables, which, as we were told, had been donated for the hospice by kind people (attracted by Mother Serafyma’s authority). The dinner tastes like at home. Cooks are good here, I thought. As we found out, they are not the only paid staff, which also includes doctors and nurses of a local polyclinic and technical staff. In a word, one takes care of the diseased here, saying that being unable to avoid suffering, we still can support each other. The hospice also takes care of the dead and buries them at its own expense when those have no family or the family does not want to admit them.
Mother Khionia told that people come here out of various reasons: people bring here their parents according to the latter’s will; but there are also those who want to get rid of gravely ill father or mother (sometimes they don’t even register the parents officially, simply leave them like kittens at the monastery’s gate); and homeless people are brought here by the militia.
I feel outraged: “Mother, the Bible says: for you to live well, respect your parents.”
“Don’t judge and you won’t be judged either” was her laconic reply, after which she continued, “We take people with various physical illnesses, as well as mentally diseased. We don’t take only those who have infectious diseases, as they need special conditions. The youngest resident of our Home of Mercy is 75.” Then she offered me to get acquainted with some of the patients.
Vira Prykhodko, 76. Though she is a bed patient, she asked me to avoid speaking about illnesses. Instead she inquired me about Kyiv, from the prices for food products to political moods of the Kyivites.
“I am simple interested in life,” she summarized.
On the way to another ward, Mother Khionia told about the everyday routine in the hospice. They wake up at 6 a.m., because all the residents are elderly people and a complete ward round is needed. Breakfast is at 9 a.m. (The menu is composed according to the age and state of health of the patients.) They have leisure time between the breakfast and dinner. With the blessing of Mother Serafyma and senior priest Father Filip, Wednesday and Friday are fasting days. The first part of Lent is strict as well. Besides, the spiritual “menu” includes Sacred Liturgies, spiritual conversations with the priest, and last rites before the holidays.
I asked, “Do people change after these spiritual practices, even if they are not religious?”
“Those who live longer change,” I heard in response. “But I can say for sure that everyone becomes calmer.”
We reached our destination and met Mother Lia, 94. (The Home of Mercy takes care of elderly nuns as well.) She took to her bed because of hip joint fracture. I try to encourage her, expressing my sincere admiration with her ability to sit on the bed and let down her legs. She made a displeased face, showing that she did not want to be treated like a child. Say, she had lived long enough and when God called her she would be ready for the meeting. Afterwards she inquired about my life and promised to pray for me.
“Are you wondering now whether all the residents of the Home of Mercy accept death as a move to God?” Mother Khionia was right in her guess. “Not everyone says this aloud. But strange as it may seem, they have no fear of death. Probably it is because of their age. When a person approaches the end of his/her life, s/he understands that this is a logical end.” She went on, “Apparently it would be impossible to serve here without God’s goodness. True, I have become more pacified, patient, and merciful. But one can learn much from our residents. This regularity in the evening of life makes them more watchful, more attentive to the details, and thankful for every day they live. Along with them I become grateful for the gift of life, in this world and eternity.”
A friend of mine told me that he started to really value life after resuscitation: enjoy the sunset, rejoice at every new day, and thank God for a nice interlocutor. In a special way the hospice made me understand the great value of life, too.
TO THE POINT
You are welcome to help the Home of Mercy by sending donations to the account 26005000039192
MFO 300023
PJSC “Ukrsotsbank”
EDRPOU* 23988451
*Unified State Register of Enterprises and Organizations of Ukraine
