Fewer and fewer Ukrainians want to marry foreigners. According to the Justice Ministry, every year their numbers are shrinking by 5%. While 864 Ukrainian nationals registered marriages with foreign nationals in 2000, this figure was 740 in 2004. In effect, this is where the official statistics end. It turns out that Ukraine has no government agency that keeps track of marriage migration and assesses its actual scale. Sociologists have yet to conduct surveys on international marriages. Meanwhile, as evidenced by online advertisements, international dating and marriage agencies are mushrooming.
Marriage migration has always existed and nothing’s going to change that. The women’s rights organization, La Strada Ukraine, claims that its dynamics remain virtually unchanged. Certainly, there is nothing wrong with international marriages. As family psychologists like to say, understanding is the key to a successful marriage. This is not the question here, though. International marriages are beyond any control in Ukraine, and marriages to foreigners tend to raise suspicious eyebrows here.
According to psychologist Valentyna Bondarovska, who manages the international center Rozrada [Consolation], despite their tangible economic advances since the early 1990s, Ukrainian women continue to view Western fiancОs as a kind of winning lottery ticket that will guarantee them a life of affluence and happiness. This is mostly true of women in the peripheries. But even in big cities marriages to foreigners are not a rare occurrence. “Perhaps this stems from the fondness for miracles that is part of our mentality,” Bondarovska says.
However, this is a misconception. A woman who is eager to break free from here usually does not know the laws of the host country, most of which tend to favor citizens of that country. According to La Strada Ukraine social programs manager Tetiana Mitiura, conflicts most often arise over children, while Western laws strive for complete equality of men and women. The only way for a mother to keep her child is to win in court. But Ukrainian women often lose in court because of their poor command of the foreign language and the lack of adequate legal support. Material wellbeing after the divorce is also a problem. Where no marriage contract was signed, the spouse may retain up to one-half of the property acquired during the marriage, if the court so decides. But in many countries divorce is a costly procedure, and it is not clear who may benefit from it in the end. For example, a foreign woman who marries an American man in the US does not receive a permanent residence permit for two years. If their marriage is dissolved before that, the woman is immediately forced to leave the country. In some cases women end up being found guilty. In one striking case, a woman who moved to Spain realized that her new husband was not the gallant gentleman who had courted her in Ukraine. She decided to get a divorce, but took no notice of the fact that her husband was jobless. As a result, the court ordered the unlucky Ukrainian woman to pay him alimony.
Unfortunately, there have been even more tragic cases. Unofficial statistics suggest that one in six Ukrainian women who go abroad end up in the hands of human traffickers. Most often they are labor migrants traveling abroad to work as kitchen help, dancers, or nannies, who upon arriving are forced into the sex trade. There have been cases, however, when Slavic wives have been used as surrogate mothers without their knowledge, forced to work as maids, or also forced into the sex trade. “Most surprisingly, despite being aware of the possible dangers, prospective brides rarely attempt to check out their potential husbands, get to know them better on neutral territory, or devise some escape routes, even though many organizations, particularly La Strada, dedicate a lot of their work to educating women,” Tetiana Mitiura complained.
There is a partial explanation for their rashness. Marriage migration has become a lucrative business in Ukraine for all parties. First, there are the marriage agencies. “In effect, they report only to tax inspectors. After all, unlike civilized countries, Ukraine doesn’t have public control over their operations. Marriage agencies are not subject to licensing either,” says Valentyna Bondarovska. In the US, these agencies must inform their clients in their native language that they have the right to demand that prospective spouses provide information about any prior convictions, diseases, and former spouses. Meanwhile, in Ukraine agencies consider it more expedient to conceal the flaws of fiancОs, since sometimes they pay for every letter they receive from prospective brides.
Second, there is a demand for Ukrainian women abroad. Leaving all unfortunate and criminal cases aside, psychologists claim that Slavic women are more inclined toward marriage and family than German or American women. The latter are also less maternal and more emancipated. Of course, another key factor is that in a foreign country a woman will be more pliant and less demanding, especially if she hails from a less economically developed country.
Third, Ukraine needs foreign husbands. Statistically, there are only 867 men per 1,000 women in Ukraine. The life expectancy for Ukrainian men is an average of twelve years less than for women, and men are three times more likely to die at a young age than women. Moreover, in the provinces, which have the largest numbers of women who want to marry foreigners, men often abuse alcohol two to three times more often than urban males. It is therefore not surprising that a gallant and rich fiancО is a godsend to many women.
Finally, foreign fiancОs are often used as vehicles. According to Valentyna Bondarovska, some Ukrainian women work out a detailed plan: they set up a sham marriage and calculate its duration until the moment they obtain a residence permit. “The burden of doubts felt by enterprising representatives of the ‘weaker’ sex is much lighter than the weight of problems they face in their home country,” Bondarovska said. In a particularly striking case, a young woman married a Frenchman, who later showed her the door. It was a miracle that she managed to return to Ukraine. Yet three months later she was buying a ticket for a flight to Sydney.
There are many factors that motivate Ukrainian women to marry foreigners, and they will apparently continue to do so in the foreseeable future. Experts believe it is crucial to regulate marriage migration and keep women informed. For example, the Ukrainian Family Code does not say anything about the citizenship of children born of an international marriage. Unlike firms that offer employment abroad, marriage agencies are not subject to any controls. Women in the provinces have virtually no access to information about the possible complications of marriage to a foreign national. As Tetiana Mitiura says, “There are very happy international marriages, but you must always protect yourself against mistakes, especially since they can have literally tragic consequences.”
